Sexual shyness as the inherent factor protecting from becoming the means for another person Cover Image

Drovumas – prigimtinis veiksnys, saugantis nuo tapimo priemone kitam
Sexual shyness as the inherent factor protecting from becoming the means for another person

Author(s): Andrius Narbekovas
Subject(s): Christian Theology and Religion
Published by: Vytauto Didžiojo Universitetas
Keywords: lytiškumas; personalizmo norma; drovumas; skaistumo dorybė; seksas; meilės dorybė; sexuality; norm of personalism; sexual shyness; virtue of chastity; sex; virtue of love;

Summary/Abstract: The article aims to present sexual shyness as an inherent characteristic that helps the person to be protected from being used as an object. The beginning of the article describes the Christian understanding of sexuality that is intrinsically related to the understanding of the human person. The distinction is made between sexual attraction and sexual instinct, having in mind that these terms are often used interchangeably. Instinctive actions urge to “choose” means without thinking about their relationship with the aims. However, human beings are capable to reflect upon the relationship between aims and means and are able to choose the means appropriate to the aims. Because of this ability to make choices the person becomes responsible for his/her choices therefore we can talk about sexual morals. The human being is both corporal and spiritual and he/she is called to love with the whole being. Therefore love includes the human body and the human body participates in spiritual activity. Sexual attraction should not be directed only to physiological and anatomical qualities of the opposite sex because these qualities do not exist separately from a concrete person. Therefore sexual attraction that is formed in a normal way is always directed to the personal self of the human being and because of this attraction there is a chance for love to begin. There is a natural tendency for sexual attraction to become love because both subjects, different in their gender, are people. Love is an exceptional quality of human beings. In order for sexual attraction to progress into the level of love the virtue of chastity is needed. The article discusses the outcomes of attempts to separate the person from his/her sexuality which ends up in fragmentation of the human being. One of the forms of sexual separation is sexual asceticism, i. e. attempt to live as an asexual being when the person is disgusted by his/her sexuality and denies it at the same time denying his/her personal essence and sexuality as a gift. Another form of separating the person from his/her sexuality is that of taking a “playboy“ or a “playgirl“ position when the person keeps distance from personal involvement by this depersonalising his/her own sexuality. Meanwhile, the chaste person cherishes all life and love potentials inherent to him/her and sees personal sexuality as a good and a gift. It is impossible to understand the virtue of chastity separately from the virtue of love because of the inherent ability of the person to love. The purpose of chastity is to liberate love from consumer attitude and at the same time to protect the person from being used. The virtue of chastity is related to sexual shyness, which is inseparable from self-control. Sexual shyness protects the intimate part of the human being and directs the person’s glances and actions in the way that they would correspond to personal dignity and the dignity of the relationship.

  • Issue Year: 49/2007
  • Issue No: 21
  • Page Range: 21-29
  • Page Count: 9
  • Language: Lithuanian